The happiest place on earth

More details in a few days, but it surely lived up to its reputation for Ella and her maternal grandparents!

Love,

Rebecca

Words of wisdom from Rabbi Avi Weiss

We're not just a nation; we're a nation family

The election is over. Half of America is upbeat; the other half is deflated. The country is more polarized than ever. As a rabbi, I can only offer some words of spiritual reflection.

Our point of departure is the recognition that for many supporters of Hillary Clinton, this is a time of mourning -- mourning that the glass ceiling of a female United States President was not shattered; mourning that their "champion" was defeated; mourning that their dream for America has gone awry. For some, the disappointment is so great that it is similar to a grieving experience. At such times, the rabbis say, the pain is so deep, the loss so profound that no words of comfort will work.

Still, as the Talmud records, "it is sufficient for a mourner to keep his or her period of mourning." In other words, there are times in life when one cannot avoid bereavement; it's built in and cannot be cast aside. In the same breath, the Talmud uses the phrase "it is sufficient" -- teaching that one should not elongate the mourning, one should do all he or she can to move forward.

Certainly different people will mourn at different paces, but as many begin to move forward, I present a kind of post-election soulful prayer.

I offer the prayer that we remain hopeful, hopeful that once assuming office, President Trump will be different than candidate Trump. We have seen this occur in the past; candidates, once assuming the presidency, transform.

Many people were wary when Richard Nixon became president. Worried, amongst other concerns, that he was a war monger who would exacerbate the Cold War. His presidency, however, marked serious deflections from this presumption. Nixon was the first president to visit China since its establishment in 1949. He also traveled to Russia, initiating a policy of détente, or period of improved relations between the United States and then-Soviet Union.

And many people were fearful when Ronald Reagan -- considered by many to be a loose cannon and known by all to have little experience in foreign relations -- assumed the presidency. He turned it around, becoming known as "the Great Communicator," skillfully, forcefully but eloquently demanding that the Soviets be true to human rights. The Cold War was grinding to a halt.

My prayer of hope is that Trump experiences a similar transformation. Certainly he deserves -- as Hillary Clinton and President Barack Obama gracefully said -- every chance to succeed.

And then there is the prayer of faith, faith in the goodness of people. Clearly there are extremists on the right that are ecstatic that Trump won. But as there are extremists on the right, there are extremists on the left who supported Clinton.

Here, it is crucial that we not paint over the millions of people who voted for Trump with the narrow brush of the fringe right. Similarly, it is critical we not paint all of the people who voted for Clinton with the narrow brush of the extreme left.

Finally, I offer the prayer of trust, trust that the American system of government will work. This system declares that if a president steps over the line, overreaches, he or she will be held accountable. Not only will government and the judiciary hold the president accountable, but the people will do the same.

This is what occurred when Presidents Nixon and Bill Clinton, each in their own way, abused the power of the presidency. In the end, democracy teaches that America is bigger, much bigger, than any president.

Most important, we can all play a role in bringing our nation together, in healing the wounds of a divisive election. We can do this by listening to those whose pain we feel, and those whose pain we have yet to feel. Listen to the angst of the unemployed auto worker who fears that he will no longer be able to afford his home, and listen to the fear of the American Muslim afraid of being villainized and attacked in the streets of her own city.

Yes, America today is a polarized country. It needs healing. To heal, America must view itself not only as a nation, but as a nation-family. And the test of family is not how we listen and care for each other when we agree, but how we do so when we disagree. In this way, it may be possible to learn from each other, to give to each other, forging us into a greater, more United States.

Rabbi Avi Weiss is the founding rabbi of the Hebrew Institute of Riverdale, Bronx, NY. He is also the founder of Yeshivat Chovevei Torah and Yeshivat Maharat rabbinical schools. The views expressed in this commentary are his alone.

Touch the Sky

p.s. I was reminded after posting earlier today of a wonderful Carole King song from her 1979 album, “Touch the Sky” 

Music has charms to soothe a savage breast

Long before planning the wedding for the first of our daughters to be engaged, I had already selected a band for the wedding. I was not particular about the venue or the clothing but I was passionate about the music. By the time of that first wedding in 2000, a New York City-based band known as Inasense was playing clubs and simchas (joyous occasions) in and around the City. We first saw them at a Bar Mitzvah celebration and I was hooked. I still remember going up to the lead guitarist during a break and telling him that I had two daughters and hoped he would not be too famous to play for us by the time we were planning weddings! In the clubs they played a combination of old songs (including some great covers of Dylan tunes) and their own compositions. Their music is a mix of mainstream rock, Jewish/Middle Eastern, bluegrass, and Celtic influences.

Inasense (as they were then known) played at Dina and Aaron’s wedding in 2000, and we were thrilled that Simmie and Ronen also agreed to have them two years later. Their name had changed to Soulfarm and while some band members had come and gone, the core of C Lanzbom (guitar) and Noah Solomon (led vocals, guitar, and various percussion instruments) remained. They recorded more than ten albums from 1996-2015, and I am often touched when we arrive at Simmie’s house to find her listening to their music.

I saw a post on Facebook this morning that they will release a new album next month, Every Note the Heart Can Play. This early release of “Colorado” is perfect for these unsettling times. As William Congreve wrote in The Mourning Bride in 1697, “music has charms to soothe a savage breast.”

Enjoy!

Love,

Rebecca

Aliens

I am not a big science fiction fan, but I love Amy Adams and her new movie, “Arrival” had gotten fairly good reviews. To be honest it was a beautifully done and thoughtful film. I hope I will not tell you too much to spoil it.

In “Arrival,” Amy Adams plays a linguist working for the United States government who is summoned by NASA to try to communicate with aliens who have landed 12 spacecraft on Earth, one in Montana.

Before the landing, we see flashbacks from Louise's life including the birth of her daughter, Hannah, and Hannah's death following a diagnosis of terminal cancer.

Louise's language expertise allows her to have a communication breakthrough with the aliens on the spacecraft, discovering that the "heptapods," as they come to be known, emit a smoke that makes symbols, effectively giving them written communication. While Louise works frantically to decipher the symbols, the impatient world is ready to just destroy the ships out of fear, but she and fellow scientist Ian (played by Jeremy Renner) are encouraged by their progress and set out to prevent the destruction.

After seeing the movie we headed over to the 92^nd Street Y to hear Bob Woodward in Conversation with Bernie Swain. I am not sure just how this would have been if the results of last Tuesday had been different, but it was certainly an animated and insightful conversation.

Love,

Rebecca

A new week

One benefit of last week’s presidential election is that it must have eased the task of sermon writing for spiritual leaders around the country. Rabbi Noah Cheses, who was hired as spiritual leader of Young Israel of Sharon just a few months ago, spoke movingly, and I provide some excerpts here.

Even if we are repulsed from politics at the moment, we can’t totally disengage because there will be harmful consequences for us and for G-d’s name if we do so. Now more than ever, the political arena needs our voices. In a measured and thoughtful way, we need to use the Torah to help raise moral consciousness in American society. I believe that this is the role and responsibility of Torah Jews and perhaps all ethical monotheists at this juncture in American history. 

Getting more concrete, I believe that we cannot surrender the paramount value that the Torah places on being a good person, on having good character and being a mentch. On Wednesday morning, our daughter Adina asked us about the new president elect and wanted to know some of the good things about him and some of the bad things. We said that that he loves America but that he is not honest. Adina responded, how could someone who lies become the president? Isn’t the president of the America supposed to be a good person?

My heart sunk as I heard this question. There was a two second pause in which I felt like my world as an American and as a parent was crashing down into a million pieces. 

I told Adina that we are hopeful that the president elect will do a better job at telling the truth now that he is in a new position with new responsibilities. I really do believe that people are capable of change, especially when they are brought into a new circumstance. Leaving behind the sometimes ruthless and bottom line nature of the business world and taking up the ultimate mantel of civic duty and responsibility can change a person. My hope is that once assuming office President Trump will be different than candidate Trump. We have seen this happen with candidates in the past—from Nixon to Regan--that they change upon taking a seat in the oval office. 

What I didn’t tell my daughter that I will share with you is that although I am hopeful I am also not naive. If the president elect cannot rise to the occasion then we as Americans, as Jews and as parents need to react and hold him accountable.

Being engaged in the political arena in the years ahead will mean that we need to have the courage to hold the president accountable for the character values that our Torah holds so dear. This will not be easy but we will do it thoughtfully and we will do it together. 

I want to be clear, as I conclude and summarize my message this morning, that this drasha (sermon) could have been delivered even if the election results were different. I don’t see my role as a Rabbi as taking sides or pushing my political opinions. My role, as I see it, is to help us experience the world through a moral lens, through the prism of Torah.  We must leave behind the bad behaviors that characterized the election process, and recommit to the public good in a measured way by raising consciousness of the Torah value that being a mentch (a good person) really matters.  

This is how I think we can heal from the long, exhausting and bruising election season and how we can move forward, with our moral compass intact.

May it be Your will Hashem (Gd) that you give us the courage to heal and to move forward with strength and hope, with faith in the goodness of our country and the goodness of humanity. 

Though we still miss the original “Not Ready for Prime Time Players” of Saturday Night Live, we have made it a point to watch the opening of the show over these past months. Alec Baldwin was frequently on hand to do his uncanny Donald Trump, and cast regular Kate McKinnon has done a terrific job as Hillary Clinton. We were anxious to see what would happen with last night’s show. The death of Leonard Cohen was combined with the defeat of Hillary Clinton by having Ms. McKinnon sitting at the piano in a white pant suit playing and singing a very moving rendition of three verses of “Hellelujah” that really spoke to the feelings so many are having this week. 

Let us all take a good, deep breath (symbolically, at least for me) and do all we can to support the forces of good around us.

Love,

Rebecca

Veterans Day

Today is Veterans Day. Despite, or maybe because of, the events of this week, it would be a shame to overlook the importance of this recognition of those who have given so much to defend our country.

Veterans Day originated as “Armistice Day” on Nov. 11, 1919, the first anniversary of the end of World War I. Congress passed a resolution in 1926 for an annual observance, and Nov. 11 became a national holiday beginning in 1938. In 1954, President Eisenhower officially changed the name of the holiday from Armistice Day to Veterans Day. Veterans Day pays tribute to all American veterans–living or dead–but especially gives thanks to living veterans who served their country honorably during war or peacetime.

Veterans Day is not to be confused with Memorial Day–a common misunderstanding, according to the U.S. Department of Veterans Affairs. Memorial Day (the fourth Monday in May) honors American service members who died in service to their country or as a result of injuries incurred during battle.

Just one question: why are we still adding to the ranks of war veterans?

We awoke this morning to the sad news of the death of Leonard Cohen. It sure has been a difficult week.

Have a peaceful weekend.

Love,

Rebecca